This hits hard because one, you never want to be apart from somebody you love. You don't want them to go somewhere dangerous where there is so much of the unknown. He's risking his life for what? I don't even understand why we are still there? Aren't they suppose to be bringing our troops back? What good is all of this? First the Army tells my husband he's in the clear, then last minute tells him he's going to be deployed next month. So many thoughts and emotions running through my head. Our lives just have to stop for this.
Well after many tears and just 2 days of just not doing anything really and just enjoying us together, breaking all the rules of my training and meal plan, I realized what I was doing isn't going to make me feel any better. Heck, I felt pretty sick and gross after everything I ate. Yup... I CHEATED ALL WEEKEND LONG! Oh I paid for it alright lol. But you know, even though I got the bad news I still continued to read my personal development. That was one habit I didn't give up even during this time. It helped me to think a little bit more and get less angry at the world. I reread the one chapter in the book by John C. Maxwell's 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth where he talks about taking responsibility and not being labeled as "the victim". I wasn't going to go around and keep asking myself, "why me?" "why us"? I wasn't going to do that. Yes I could walk around and mope and cry all day long, but you know what, life was gonna go on with or without me. So I had to think to myself, what good is being sad gonna do for me. NOTHING. I also thought, it's not only me that has to see her husband leave and get deployed and risk his life. It's not personal. There are many people who have to sacrifice their lives as well. So I'm not alone in this. At least he has a job and at least I have some time with him before he goes. I have to remember that lots of people would give their lives for this country and people look up to him. I'm still having mixed emotions right now, but I've gotta be strong for him.
So I have decided while he's gone, that I will be moving back to where most of my family is in Illinois. I don't have any family down here and feel that I'd do better being close to my friends and family. I am thankful that I have a job like Beachbody where I can just take my business everywhere. So thank you BEACHBODY!!
Oh yes.. and another thing, Obviously I'm not going to do the Ft Lauderdale NPC Competition since I'm going to be in Illinois and just far from it. BUT I have spoken with my figure prep coach and I told her that I'm not gonna let this stop me from competing. So I have committed to a NEW Figure Competition called Natural Midstate Muscle Classic XXVII in Rockford, IL on November 22, 2014!! So I'm still in it!! It's nice to have the support of my coach Rebekah Willich because she was happy that I'm still on board and she's excited at how my physique is looking. My husband wouldn't have wanted me to drop everything that I've been working hard for. But it is sad that my first competition he won't get to see. So hopefully I can send him some nice photos during it. This will definitely push me a lot harder to do my best because I know he's sacrificing his life. I'm glad my friends and family will be able to watch me because I'll be closer!!
One victory this week despite me feeling way more tired this week because for ONE, I've just had a decrease in carbs so strength wise I still feel strong, but stamina has gotten low. So I was happy to say that I've reached a new high for my leg presses and was able to press 310lbs!! woo hoo! Here's proof! oh and you can see my abs coming in too :-)
Well.. let's get to my progress photos shall we!! Struggles this week, was staying strong and NOT indulging on the day of my birthday which was August 6. NOPE I did not CHEAT!! That definitely took a TON of discipline but I did it!
My weight this week dropped from 103.8lbs to 101.8lbs. Definitely leaning out a lot more! and abs are coming in pretty nice. It's exciting to see progress and makes me want to push more! See why this is so addicting?!
SO as I'm ending my blog post... I am NOT finished yet!! I just have a new goal date in mind. November 22, 2014... FIRST FIGURE COMPETITION! OFFICIALLY the countdown begins again at 15 WEEKS OUT!
Til next time....